Desire Of My Soul

Flashes of Lightning: Utter-Quiet, Hear His Voice, I AM, Trust (Watchwords for 2024)

 

As 2024 stood in the ready, a restless spiritual longing that had been stirring within me for a while surfaced. The eventual calm came with four watchwords God impressed on me—the last one is a command. Here’s what He showed me.

 

“I will take my stand at my watch post and station myself on the tower and look out to see what He will say to me.” —Habakkuk 2:1

 

© desireofmysoul.faith (.org and .com) & SoulBreaths.com. All rights reserved.

 

READING TIME: 12 MINUTES.

 

WATCHWORD GIVEN: From New Year’s Eve Eve 2023 and the initial moments of January 1, 2024, 12:01 am through God’s appointed third watch (midnight to 3 am).

 

Days before 2024 rolled in, a restlessness brewed within me as I waited for the watchword God would give me during our decades-long New Year’s Eve prayer “date.”

 
 
 

Part of it was a desire—quickening, aching, rising—for something with God, from God, that could not yet be defined—something that existed far beyond what’s been. For you, for me, for all who seek His face.

 

I’ve broken this post into the four intrinsically linked watchwords impressed on me for 2024—the first (lion’s share of the post) sets the course for the other three. I’ve also shared scriptures, some reflections, and my experiences along the way.

 

That said … How God uses this post for your walk is between you and Him, confirmed by His Word.

 

These watchwords themselves aren’t new per se . . . but how He moves in them may well be.

 

And note: they’re not more things to squeeze onto an already crowded, guilt-ridden To-Do list. This is God calling us nearer, birthed from His love and holy desire in this critical prophesy-rich hour.

 

1. Utter-Quiet

2. Hear His Voice

3. I AM

4. Trust [a command]

 

Surrendering to Him more means change is afoot, possibly leading to . . .

 

a redirection

to the unexpected, to a more humbled, childlike re-beginning in Him, the God of beginnings within beginnings

 

a release

from anything veiled under the vast, comfortable umbrella of the common, rote, patterned, sound-bite driven, self-focusing provincial surrounding us and within us

 

a shedding

of whatever the Lord highlights that has to go—like those faltering intents and mental attitude sins that have gone stealth, secreted in the crevices of our minds and souls

 

of any hardness within . . . lethargy, a distracted spirit, compromise and spiritual waning, self-focus, shrouded pretenses, deceit, duplicity of heart, or guile, false motives hidden from others and ourselves

 

a disruption

of what’s been for something more honestly and better aligned with Him . . . a truly consecrated life . . . where daily living is worship in action . . . a breaking up of what was within for a breaking through to His heart . . . the new pouring out to burst the old

 
 

 
 

#1: UTTER-QUIET

 

The spiritual restlessness mentioned earlier in this post had occurred at various times throughout my walk. And similar to the past, it signaled that a shift-and-release is unfolding.

 

But this time, the restlessness cut deeper, broader, begging for a rushing away from the “sound” pollution, the noise storm, crashing against my soul. The daily chatter, mumblings, rumblings. The spiritually intrusive along with the well-meaning busyness of life—even ministry-focused endeavors and beloved biblically-focused broadcasts and the group-immersive resonance of church services/worship, in person or online.

 

My soul sought major relief before the Lord. From other people’s voices. And especially, from my own.

 

We’re the sheep of God’s pasture. And sheep, as I recently learned, change their ear positions when they’re stressed, fearful, in pain, contented, etc.—and they don’t like loud noises. Well, I could relate. Because spiritually, my ears were twitching. The life “noise” around me—even the noise from the rest of the flock—needed quelling. God was calling.

 

I felt like a bruised sheep seeking its shepherd’s refuge, longing for His arms and assurance, His authoritative staff leading me to quieted waters, and His voice—recognizable, comforting, trustworthy—driving back the exhausting sway of the noise storm.

 

Soul desire: to find rest in the tenor of Heaven—the unalterable, unwavering calm riding on the wings of God’s Holy Spirit . . . to sit in my LORD’s utter-quiet.

 

NEW YEAR’S EVE EVE

 

The Lord called me to a special time of our year-end prayer, earlier than usual—the night before New Year’s Eve. Maybe as a kindness to relieve my soul and give it the deep exhale-inhale-exhale it panted for. Maybe to help my sheep-ears get repositioned to standing status again. Or maybe He did it for something else entirely. His lead. Mine to follow.

 

Gentle, low-key worship music—a new-to-me, refreshingly different CD that honored His Name—streamed softly in the background. No other sounds. No other voices. No daily life noise pollution. Only my Bible and journal at the ready next to me.

 

And then, in time, there it was. A stilling, a shushing of my soul.

 

His humbling utter-quiet.

 

All masks drop. His presence real, down-to-the-bone revealing. His holiness, a penetrating truth. The soul, naked before Him.

 

lowly

wordless

awed by His magnitude and might

fear-struck by His profound holiness

repentant

 

And yet, gratitude rises. His grace lifts it higher. His mercies and forgiveness gifted through our Messiah Jesus/Yeshua are overwhelming, unfathomable.

 

As I prayed-journaled, I felt like a sheep-reverted-to-a-lamb. Herded forward to a new beginning. To become like a child again before Him, humbled, leaning on Him, teachable, obedient, trusting, seeking, panting after Him, wide-eyed and filled with wonder.

 

From now and until we’re called home, may we seize our days, hours, moments. May we deep-dive, desiring Him, voyaging to unexplored depths in His utter-quiet.

 

The Lord of Hosts, Him shall you consecrate (sanctify),

He shall be your fear (trembling, holy fear),

He shall be your dread (awe).

He will be a holy place (a sacred place, a sanctuary, a mikdash)

Isaiah 8:13-14a

 
 

 
 

REFLECTIONS:

SITTING/PRAYING IN HIS UTTER-QUIET:

 

(A)

Experiencing His utter-quiet creates a radical change, freeing a believer’s soul from its worn-torn, desolated state.

 

In Genesis 1:1-2, the earth is a ghastly desolation and emptiness. God’s glory moves over the chaotic—the tehom (Hebrew for depths, subterranean waters, even a deep soul-to-soul murmuring). Torah scholar/author Avivah Gottlieb Zornberg suggests God cuts through that deep murmuring—the “primal noise”1 to form a “creative silence,” a clearing for His creation Word to come forth.

 

I sense God’s desire to do that with our desolated souls, our groaning. Cutting through our noise (internal and external) on the subterranean level to usher in His utter-quiet where relationship with Him, authentically knowing Him, honesty before Him, and deep change ignite and grow. A deeper move forward into a spiritual, consecrated lifestyle of regularly forsaking the noise to submerge in His utter-quiet.

 

(B)

A Hebrew word came to mind. It’s found toward the end of the blessing said before studying the words of Torah: la’asok.

 

It means to immerse ourselves in, soak up (as one of my rabbis used to say every Torah study), engage in, engross ourselves in, occupy ourselves with, toil in.

 

That’s what God’s utter-quiet is about. Simply “be” with Him. To sit with Him awhile. To soak up and bask in His loving, mighty presence.

 

In His quiet, our souls are quiet. As the noise within us and the noisy pressures of the world and others fade, He and His Word step forth.

 

And we’re ready to la’asok b’divrei Yeshuatenu—to soak up the words of the God of our Salvation (Psalm 68:19 [20]).

 

John 1:1, 14a

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God,

and the Word was God . . .

and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.

 
 

 
 

#2: HIS VOICE

 

Right before I opened my eyes around 5 am on New Year’s Eve, I clearly heard this spoken to me:

 

“To hear his voice, go deeper into worship.”

 

This isn’t about singing louder, cranking up the volume, wildly dancing, or gathering 100 of your closest friends for a worship fest in the backyard—as wonderful as all of that would be.

 

Going deeper in worship (in this context) is birthed within His utter-quiet presence. Wooed and radically amazed by His character and might. Overtaken by Him. Consumed by Him. His being. His holiness. His gentleness.

 

Your soul bows down. It may weep at His beauty, majesty, grace. But it can no longer be silent. It must speak out, sing out, cry out His Name, praise Him . . . because we were created for His glory (honor), called by His Name, formed to declare His praise (Isaiah 43:7, 21).

 

Words adoring Him seep out from meek crevices in your soul and stream from your lips. They can be said, they can be sung, they can be whispered, they can be exuberantly shouted. Overcome by His weighty presence, even your body might not be still.

 

That level of worship becomes a sweet offering carried by a fiery, unquenchable, indestructible passion for Him. A dance of your two souls binding together. Ascending higher in Him to new depths and breadths, climbing the rungs of Jacob’s ladder, that Heaven-and-Earth connection in Jesus/Yeshua, you join the voices of Heaven . . .

 

Holy, Holy, Holy is the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY, who was, and who is, and who is to come.

 

In that stillness of soul, that deeper worship level, your spiritual being is sensitized, nurtured, corrected, encouraged, a repository where God can release new or greater insight and understanding.

 

Walking in it. Worshiping deeper flows from the utter-quiet out to your day-to-day life, into all that you do: laundry, your job, cleaning the house, caring for family members (human and furry ones), helping others, going the extra mile, waiting in line, etc.

 

Your soul carries the calm and understanding gleaned from the utter-quiet so your life becomes humble worship before Him, before others. Because with every breath, it’s about Him, it’s about Him, it’s about Him. Breathing Him in, exhaling Him out to the world.

 

I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.

Ani l’dodi v’dodi li’

אני לדודי ודודי לי

 

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,

knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward.

You are serving the Lord Messiah.

Colossians 3:23-24

 
 

 
 

#3: I AM

#4: TRUST [a command]

 

New Year’s eve with the Lord began with His addressing a recent, spiritually sorrowful upset in our family.

 

NOTE: What the Lord impressed on me is relevant to all of us, whatever situations we face or will be facing going forward.
 

About a month prior, an in-law went rogue. Prodigal. And that forced a heart-wrenching rift in their marriage. My soul reeled, aching first and foremost for my immediate family member experiencing it . . . but also for the one causing the pain, blinded by what they’ve done.

 

No matter how many times I’d asked the Lord if I could call, text, whatever, His answer was the same: a flat no.

 

But my soul was wrecked. I’d gone prodigal in my earlier adult years in the Lord—nearly 50 years ago—and the pain of that still stings.

 

So I kept petitioning Him: “Lord, someone has to speak to this person. They need help. They need to see spiritually what they’ve done and where they’re headed. Please, send someone. Who will go?”

 

And bam! Just like that, God had these words looming taller than me and BOLDLY LARGE before me, appearing like this:

 

I

AM

 

This wasn’t God merely saying, “Hey, I’ve got it covered.”

 

He was conveying much more, wanting me—and all of us—to more fully, deeply embrace and more firmly stand expectantly on His Name which we know reveals His character:

 

I AM the Great One. I AM the Mighty One.

I AM the GREAT I AM.

And I and I alone will be doing this.

I AM.

 

Only I AM can move into the heart. Only I AM can send His Spirit to convict and counsel the soul.

 

In Isaiah 45, He declares: I AM the LORD and there is no other . . . I, the LORD, speak righteousness . . . There is no other God besides Me . . . A just God and a Savior.

 

Immediately, the Lord hung another word—a command—also tall and BOLDLY LARGE looming before me. It was so spiritual that it became somewhat physical . . . I had to lean back a bit to avoid nearly “bumping” into it as I tried to sit down on my sofa, grasping what He was doing. That’s how real and palatable it was.

 

TRUST

 

His command meant: TRUST the GREAT I AM.

Trust in His character, His love, His long, long, long-suffering.

TRUST His timing. Don’t jump ahead.

Don’t lean away . . . doing a “little” something to help out.

TRUST the GREAT I AM.

 

There’s a difference between faith (אמונה, emunah) and trust (בִּטָּחוֹן, bitachon): Believing God exists is faith. But trust is having the certainty, the confidence, that God is “involved in events and that their outcome accords with His will,” as The Stone Edition of the Chumash (Torah) puts it.

 

For me, trust is walking on a high-wire with no visible net, putting my faith (emunah) in the GREAT I AM (who is my net).

 

May we grow closer to Him in this hour of biblical prophetic history . . . growing in His love and bearing His NAME to a lost world.

 

1. Run to Him in His utter-quiet.

2. Go deeper in worship to Hear His Voice.

3. Fix your eyes on the GREAT I AM.

4. Walk in His command . . . TRUST the GREAT I AM.

 
 

REFERENCES & RESOURCES

1. The Murmuring Deep, Avivah Gottlieb Zornberg. Schocken Books, New York, 2009

2. The Stone Edition of the Chumash (Parasha Vayeishev, Genesis 37-40:23, pg 221)

 
 

PHOTO CREDITS

Lighthouse by Michael Krahn on Unsplash.com

Clustered flock of sheep by Christopher Burns on Unsplash.com

Light surrounding a single sheep by Mike Erskine on Unsplash.com

Jesus praying to the Father, sheep following by ArtPlus, purchased on istock.com

Jesus helping lamb stuck on cliff ledge by ArtPlus, purchased on istock.com

ABC Roadmap to Heaven: The Broken Bridge

 

The Heaven-Earth expanse. How can our fractured, earth-driven souls be guaranteed an eternity with God in His holy place? God made the Way. But accepting that way is up to you.

 

© desireofmysoul.faith & SoulBreaths.com. All rights reserved.

 
 

READING TIME: 4 MINUTES.

 

Worldview insists that there are many ways to reach God and enter heaven—and that God is whatever He means to you. Don’t fall for that. There’s no “harmonizing” of various religious ways or bundling it all under global religio-culturalism.

 

One World Religion and a whatever-you-do-is-cool spirituality are LIES from the master deceiver—satan—and a deceptive, self-desired-focus human soul.

 

God is clear in His instruction manual—the Bible—about who He is . . . and who we are. And what He requires for worship and salvation. Understanding that is the critical first step before you’re able to walk on His one-way road to heaven.

 

So let’s start our path toward those ABCs of Salvation by setting worldview aside and getting down to some straight facts about who God is—a quick 4-1-1—according to what He says about Himself in His Word, the Bible. Then we’ll take a look at how we stack up to who He is.

 

#1. HIS NAME IS HIS CHARACTER

 

The Great I AM. El Elyon, the Most High.

Faithful. Justice. Righteous. Truth.

Ha Kadosh, the Holy One.

Perfect. Steadfast. Mercy. Grace.

A Strong Tower. El Shaddai, the Almighty God.

El Gibbor, the Powerful Warrior, Hero, Mighty Champion.

Adonai, the LORD, Master.

Adonei ha’adonim, the LORD of lords.

The Living God, King of Kings, our Judge, the Rock.

He alone is God. There is none like Him.

Haggo’el, the Redeemer. Sar Shalom, Prince/Ruler of Peace.

There is no salvation apart from Him.

He knows all things and declares the end from the beginning.

His decisions stand, His rule is forever.

 

#2. THERE ARE NONE LIKE HIM

(more scriptures at end of post)
 

I AM the LORD, and there is no one else.
I have not spoken in secret, in some dark land . . .
I, the LORD, speak righteousness,
Declaring things that are right . . .
There is no other GOD besides Me,
A righteous GOD and a SAVIOR,
There is none except Me.
Turn to Me and be saved,
all the ends of the earth.
Isaiah 45: 18b, 19, 21b, 22

 

But the LORD is the true GOD;

he is the living GOD and the everlasting King.

Jeremiah 10:10a

 

Have you not known? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He does not faint or grow weary;

his understanding is unsearchable.

Isaiah 40:28

 

You are my Lord,

apart from you I have no good thing.”

Psalm 16:1

 
 
elia-pellegrini-kV_u_GsXnwQ-unsplash
 
 

HOW DO WE STACK UP?

 

Ever since the Garden of Eden, humanity has shown its propensity for rebellion against God—choosing our selfish desires over His ways and falling for satan’s trickery.

 

Here are just a few (of many) scriptures revealing humanity’s soul condition. These are from both sides of the Judaic-Messianic bridge.

 

For there isn’t one righteous person on earth

who does [only] good and does not sin.

—Ecclesiastes 7:20 (CJB)

 

The Lord has looked down from heaven upon the sons of mankind

to see if there are any who understand, who seek God.

They have all turned aside, together they are corrupt;

there is no one who does good, not even one.

Psalm 14:2-3 (NASB)

 

The imaginings [inclinations] of a person’s heart are evil from his youth.

Genesis 8:21b (CJB)

 

True, I was born guilty

was a sinner from the moment my mother conceived me.

Psalm 51:7 [5] (CJB)
 

For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of the Lord (ESV).
—Romans 3:23

 

OUR SINS SEPARATE US FROM HIM

 

Adonai’s arm is not too short to save,

nor His ear too dull to hear,

rather it’s your own crimes [sins]

that separate you from God.

Isaiah 59:1

 

Against you, you only, have I sinned

and done what is evil from your perspective;

so that you are right in accusing me and justified in passing sentence . . .

Turn away your face from my sins, and blot out all my crimes.

Psalm 51:6,11 (4,9)

 

THE HUMAN HEART LIES TO OUR SOUL

 

The heart is deceitfully wicked,

who can know it?

I, Adonai, search the heart.

I test inner motivations in order to give to everyone

what his actions and conduct deserve.

—Jeremiah 17:9-10

 

If we claim not to have sin,

we are deceiving ourselves,

and the truth is not in us.

—1 John 1:8

 

HUMAN GOOD FALLS SHORT

 

All of our righteousness

are like menstrual rags [filthy],

misdeeds blown in the wind.

—Isaiah 64:5 [6] (CJB)

 

For the person who keeps all of the laws except one is

as guilty

as a person who has broken all of God’s laws.

James 2:10

 

Yep, that’s us: we all break His Law every day . . . one way or another, at any given moment. In thoughts, words, actions. And it’s by those thoughts, words, actions that we’ll be judged.

 

HOPE UP AHEAD

 

With that reality check, how can any of us bridge the relationship gap with a holy God? We’re only human, right?

 

READ THE ANSWER in Part 2. ABC ROADMAP TO HEAVEN: FIRST, THE REAL JESUS.

 
 
 

* * * * *

 

MORE REVEALS ABOUT GOD’S CHARACTER

 

The Bible is filled from page one to its last page with truths about God’s character and our fractured state. The scriptures below are but a few more revealing His majesty and power.

 

For I am GOD, and there is no other;

I am GOD, and there is no one like Me,

declaring the end from the beginning

and from ancient times things not yet done,

saying, “My counsel shall stand,

and I will accomplish all my purpose.”

—Isaiah 46:9-10

 

There is none holy like the Lord:

for there is none besides you;

there is no rock like our God.

—2 Samuel 2:2

 

The LORD passed before him [Moses] and proclaimed,

The LORD, the LORD, a GOD merciful and gracious,

slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness,

keeping steadfast love for thousands,

forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin,

but who will by no means clear the guilty,

visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children

and the children’s children,

to the third and the fourth generation.”

—Exodus 34:6-7

 

For I will proclaim the name of ADONAI.

Come, declare the greatness of our GOD!

The Rock, his work is perfect,

for all his ways are justice.

A GOD of faithfulness who does no wrong,

he is justice and righteous.

Deuteronomy 32:3-4
 
 

For My thoughts are not your thoughts,

Nor are your ways My ways, declares the LORD.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth,

So are My ways higher than your ways

And My thoughts than your thoughts.

—Isaiah 55:8-9

 

PHOTO CREDITS:

Lit cobblestone photo by Ray Fragapane on Unsplash.com

Person in red photo by Elia Pellegrini on Unsplash.com

Journey on